October Adventures.

Happiness can often be a decision. You can't wait around for the light to shine through the clouds. Sometimes... you have to just have fun in the dark. I am going to be completely broke in about a month but that's okay. I am going on crazy awesome adventures. Not to mention....Christmas is coming. Anyway, tonight is METRIC! That is right. Pure awesome. I am still in shock that I am even going. I will write all about it later. Tomorrow is Halloween. I am going Trick or Treating. Haha I lost my costume though!!!! I searched everywhere. I remember seeing it in the summer when I cleaned out my closet. I shouldn't have done that. Oh well. I will just let Claire dress me up in whatever she wants =) Within reason. Haha

Happy Friday to everyone!!
-Lexi

Now for a moment of Edgar Allan Poe. Just because he is awesome.
And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming,
And the lamp-light o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted - nevermore!
- Edgar Allan Poe (1845) "The Raven"

"Will you sing me a song?"

Today, I woke up early. To avoid falling behind in school, I often go in for tutorial. Chem tutorial starts at 8am. My Father drives me, but we have to leave by 7:30. I set my alarm for 6... with the hope of getting up relaxed, having a shower, and maybe watching the news. But, this does not happen. I pull out of bed at 7:10- scramble for food, and rush out of my house feeling gross. I will back track a bit though. 7:10... I come out of my room. My Dad is already sitting at the kitchen table, reading the paper, and drinking his coffee. He comments on my grumpy face, and tells me to hurry up. I pour some cereal...and we sit briefly and talk. We usually both agree that it would be nice to stay home, pull out the amazingly warm electric blanket, curl up on the couch, put in a Harry Potter movie, and fall asleep. We laugh. I am still exhausted, so I eat quietly while he talks about news articles. This is the ultimate in small talk. The time is now 7:25. I have 5 minutes to pull everything together, but still I sit. This is where he asks me a question. A question that nearly always brings me close to tears. But as hard as I try, I am unable to hold a straight face. I always smile. "Will you sing me a song?"

In Heart and Mind...

It has nearly been a week, so it is time to blog. What topic shall I choose?

I will start with a quote I read on Saturday.
"I demand unconditional love, and complete freedom. That is why I am terrible." (sorry, I don't know the author)

This quote really speaks for itself. It holds its weight. I like it. Hmmmm I think an extremely good balance can be achieved though. Freedom allows for love. Love can release a freedom from within.

What else do I have......

I really enjoy a band called 'Sleeping at Last' they are very poetic. I forget about them sometimes, but I always come back. Today I had a song stuck in my head. It was one of their songs called "Quicksand" I will post the lyrics. Then you can become extremely excited, and go listen for yourself.

There are wires in between
Human heart and machine.
I will wait for mountains
To tell me you're okay

On paper my future will lay.
Ill fold every failure into a crane.

Trust is quicksand,
Claiming everything I have,
All to give me life, all to give me life.

Slow down, hide your eyes!
The sun is setting fire
Through glass, branches deep.
I cough only to breathe.

Trust is quicksand,
Claiming everything I have,
All to give me life, all to give me life.
One thousand more to go,
Ill send every prayer from below.
I was swallowed by a whale.

Slow down, you're all words
And love is made of yarn.
Scissors,
A slip of the hand, a slip of the tongue;
God knows I meant no harm, I meant no harm.

In between every promise and lie there is a kiss.
In between tempers and suitcases there is a kiss.

In between medicine and the sick there is a kiss.
In between arrows, aim, and release, there is a kiss.

(Anchors in reverse
Lead us back to birth.)

Trust can be hard. With your whole self you can want to trust, but sometimes there is nothing left- and you can't. It pulls you in. Like quicksand. That is all I have to say about it. I think. Maybe I will think of something profound to say later.

Now for a moment of random thoughts...

Silence cries out.
Both content and anxious.
Thoughts of light and dark.
Silence loves.
Silence hates.
Will you speak out?
Will it help?

That is all for now.
-Lexi
Ps. Metric in 5 days.

Endless words....poetry time?

Hello everyone. Today I am going to share some words with you. They ripped out of my heart a few nights ago. More will be added, some might be taken...but for now, this is it. I hope you enjoy. It is not sad. It is a bridge to clarity. Passionate. And confused....

You let me in.
I stand in the hall and pace.
I can see your room.
I can see where you dance.
Sometimes you let me peek,
sometimes I can stay and watch...
but I can not come in.
The door closes.
I am still welcome in the hall,
but it is not the same.
The clues I no longer can see.
The chances I no longer can feel.
Holding on to you is a fight.
I could let go.
Take to the sky and fly away...
but it is not sane.
It is not my way.
Hope lives on.
It lives on for me.
I know what is happening.
It is like a faint whisper in my thoughts.
Like the wind...
Can't be seen, but it can be felt.
Both warm and cold,
strong and weak.
Clarity comes with time.
It comes from experience.
I live on.

-Lexi

The Weekly Blog.

So... I guess this has turned into a weekly blog. It just sort of happened. Whatever.
It has snowed here already and it is only the beginning of October. I don't mind, I like the snow. It is pretty. There are just a few things I do not like about winter. Mainly I do not enjoy shoveling snow...and I don't really enjoy ice. I fall down, and it makes transportation slow. Other than that, I can deal.
Since I last wrote a blog, Thanksgiving has passed. It was good. My family has never really made a big deal about Thanksgiving but I enjoy it all the same. I like the idea of it. I have much to be thankful for, so I think that a holiday designated towards remembering these things is excellent. This year I went to Claires house for the festivities. Great food and great people. And enough inside jokes to never stop laughing.
Hmmmm what else.... Oh! I started a new book. It's called "A Scanner Darkly" it is good. I like it. I will make sure to talk about it later.
I will leave it at that for now. I have a project in print design due very soon. I should get working.

Bye for now.
-Lexi

Too long.

I took over a week off from blogging.... been going through some rough days that I never thought would come. But I lost my step, and this was the result. There is something interesting about being very sad though, suddenly everything starts to look a lot better.
I really don't have much to talk about, I just know that if I don't force myself to write... I won't. It isn't that I don't write all the time, I just have to be careful about internet writing.
Sooo much has happened in the past week that doing a recap seems over the top. So I am just going to talk about my most recent excitement.

Tegan and Sara + New single = Makes Lexi's life.

This single is off the soon to be released album "Sainthood" which I am completely excited for. I heard this song for the first time today, and have listened to it through at least 20 times. It has so much energy!!! It gets me excited. It is catchy...but not annoying. Double bonus! Haha I can tell already that I am going to listen to this album way too much. If you haven't listened to it yet, I suggest you go the the Tegan and Sara website and check it out.

Have fun!
-Lexi

Sleep.

I have not been in the mood to write. Sometimes I just slip into a strange phase where my passions are not evident. It is odd. I am tired. My brain is no longer functioning properly. It is time for some sleep. So, instead of blogging tonight...I am going to close my eyes and drift into my peaceful state. Much to blog about later. The weekend is near...

Goodnight, and good resting to everyone.
-Lexi